Tonight, by moonlight, I will rake my
leaves into my neighbor’s yard.
Had it up to here with sugary-sweet affirmation books that ignore the pleasures of resentment and mean-spiritedness? Tired of the self-helpaholics who’ve been sipping too much chicken soup? Then this book is for you.
Here are 365 splendidly bitter daily meditations that will appeal to the cynic in you. Nowhere else will you find such odes to self-absorption as:
·Today I will equate material possessions with love.
·Today I will taunt others until they cry, then tell them they are too sensitive.
·Today I will make a new friend based solely on how he or she can further my career.
·Today I will respect my need to sabotage everyone else’s success.
For the pessimist in all of us I have turned my copy into an autograph book; I have my friends and co-workers sign the quote that is most like them. My favorite: “Unlike me, the seasons serve a purpose.” If that sort of thing makes you laugh, this book is for you… you cynic you!
Instant humor to lighten the soul. Reading our true thoughts If you ever drifted your thoughts during a conversation and thought, “I wish I could say what I’m really thinking right now,” you need to read this book. Rarely can I listen to a comic or read the funny pages in the newspaper and have a good deep laugh. After reading `Today I Will Nourish My Inner Martyr` I felt I wasn’t the only cynical person in the world who would like to say, “Tonight by moonlight I will rake leaves onto my neighbors yard.”
Perfect for embittered cynics (like me!) The title caught my eye and after reading only a few lines, I knew I’d hit the jackpot. When I read the whole book, I laughed so hard my ribs hurt, and that’s pretty amazing considering I’m a pessimist. This book is the ideal gift for intellectual, sarcastic cynics who have a warped sense of humor. I wouldn’t recommend it for the cutesy, ‘huggy bunny’ class of folks…first of all, they wouldn’t ‘get’ the jokes, and secondly they’d be outraged if not horrified. This makes the book all more…