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Boundaries in Marriage

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Learn when to say yes and when to say no—to your spouse and to others—to make the most of your marriage

Only when a husband and wife know and respect each other’s needs, choices, and freedom can they give themselves freely and lovingly to one another. Boundaries are the “property lines” that define and protect husbands and wives as individuals. Once they are in place, a good marriage can become better, and a less-than-satisfying one can even be saved.

Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, counselors and authors of the award-winning bestseller Boundaries, show couples how to apply the 10 laws of boundaries that can make a real difference in relationships. They help husbands and wives understand the friction points or serious hurts and betrayals in their marriage—and move beyond them to the mutual care, respect, affirmation, and intimacy they both long for.

Boundaries in Marriage helps couples:

• Set and maintain personal boundaries and respect those of their spouse
• Establish values that form a godly structure and architecture for their marriage
• Protect their marriage from different kinds of “intruders”
• Work with a spouse who understands and values boundaries—or work with one who doesn’t

Establishing and understanding boundaries are crucial to the success of a marriage, according to authors Cloud and Townsend, who cowrote the award-winning and biblically-based book Boundaries. For example, boundaries help us understand where one person ends and the other begins, the authors claim: “Once we know the boundaries, we know who should be owning the problem we are wrestling with,” they write. “This issue of ownership is vital to any relationship, especially marriage.” But more significantly, couples need to claim and take responsibility for the “treasures that lie within their individual borders,” such as: “feelings, attitudes, behaviors, choices, limits, desires, thoughts, values, talents, and love.” Based on the book that elevated them to national prominence, Cloud and Townsend caution readers not to use this self-help manifesto as a means to change one’s spouse. Rather, this is a book about taking responsibility for oneself in all aspects of life, but especially within the boundaries of marital commitment.

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3 thoughts on “Boundaries in Marriage

  1. Great Book 0

  2. This book saved my marriage and my sanity Literally it did. I had read dozens of books trying to find a way to salvage my marriage, including several advising doing anything to please your husband. You know the ones-“no matter what,stay sweet” kind of thing,but building a truly loving marriage isn’t that simple. “Boundaries in Marriage” gives advice on how you (man or woman)can be loving but also stand firm- stand firm in the areas that define your freedom as an individual, your self respect and your dignity as a human being. This was…

  3. An Incredibly Helpful Book for the Married and the Engaged! This was the first book by Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend that I have read. Therefore, I can neither confirm nor deny another reviewer’s statement that it is essentially a rehash of the original Boundaries book. Having not read any of the other Boundaries books yet, I found this one to be quite excellent.Whether or not you are a believer in Christ, this book can still be incredibly helpful if you’re willing to read it with an open mind. It may even be helpful if you have a closed…

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